I could see it all, but the world still called me blind. My soul had reached the core of ancient wisdom, but my body betrayed me by and by. Suddenly I had an answer to everything, and I could see patterns of the collective unconscious as clear as the day, and I could understand the intricacies of life’s delicate web, but my tongue would shake when I tried to prove the utility of these concepts. In my mind, the ideas felt like a haven of pure genius and beauty and I knew it..in my bones.. that these ideologies had enough strength to shift the very core of living matter, but when presented out into the world, merely a lump of ridicule and wishful chimeras did my utters turned out to be. It was a strange and almost frightful experience, for I had all the potential of the world in my throbbing, crying heart, there was a strong longing to be heard and appreciated for the miracles I had been bestowed with, but when I opened my hands, all I could see was dirt. All I became was dirt..
And so, I maintain, the attainment of enlightenment is vain If we do not have the strength to come back to the broken reality that is this world, with the knowledge that we have gained.
The spiritual dimensions of life are ideal, absolute and free from error and dense logic. There is no room for right and wrong. In such state of life experience, every feeling is automatically translated into profound behavioural insights. These experiences have taught me immensely about the patterns of unconscious that leads the masses; as to how a robust physique, without exception, equates to sexual aggression in adolescence, or how every disciplined, honest-to-god man gets tangled with an emotionally unavailable woman.
These insights had shown me the exact pathway of how society breeds a monster, a child predator; why some people decide to assign non binary flag to their identity, and why homosexuality exists. Every nook and cranny of madness had become my long lost friend and I could read humans like textbook.
When it came to such knowledge, i wouldn’t have hesitated in calling myself superior from the rest, but at the end, all this was.. was mere knowledge. What difference did it make for the betterment of the world, to connect my heart with other human beings, to bring a smile over a face? Nada.
Such is the cursing dexterity of enlightenment without the capibility of bringing its richness into the physical dimensions. There is no running to the bliss of ignorance, and no achievement, nothing credible to back up what makes us unique. And so, the victim of pre enlightenment gets neither here nor there.
To stand out from the best of the best feels like a dream in the beginning, but when we get too far at listening to the calling of the self, playful rebellion becomes unbearable incidents of ostracisation and abandonment.